May 4th, 2010

It's the end of the year, wow. I feel like I spent so much time last year standing at the edge and gazing into the metaphorical pool of college that I sort of didn't really realize when I fell in and was submerged. It literally seems to me like just yesterday I was driving home with Bailey from school and we were saying it'd be so weird to not see each other every day next year. I was never one of those people who hated high school and couldn't wait to get out, but the idea of college was, of course, alluring. While I don't know how exactly I got here, I do know that I'd come a long way. I compiled the following list of highlights:

15 things I have learned about myself this year:

1) I am a Hokie at heart J. It’s corny, but I have learned that I really belong here at Virginia Tech and I can’t imagine any place in the world I’d be happier going to college. I think the best thing I ever did was realize that life takes us where it will, and so I went with the flow and ended up at this really amazingly special place.

2) I CAN be good at living on a tight budget when I need to be. Having to save for New York City this Spring was definitely taxing, but when it came down to it, I was able to do without any extras. I’ve also realized there are going to be very few times in the foreseeable future when I’m going to have to live on a tight budget, which is nice also…

3) I probably come across a lot stronger to a lot of people than I mean to. I guess this is something I sort of realized before, but it’s really hit home this year, and I’m definitely in the process of learning when it’s better NOT to keep it quite so real with people, and to withhold my opinions when sharing them isn’t going to be constructive or helpful.

4) I’m totally over my teenage rebellion. My relationships with my family members have literally never been better. While I’ve always been close to my mom and my brother, I feel like my dad and I have totally connected this year and we have gotten really close. I’ve also realized that Jimmy is the person I miss most now that I’m at school.

5) I’m actually more economically liberal than socially liberal. This surprised me, because I’m pretty darn socially liberal. I guess with all of the financial crisis and everything economics has been more at the forefront of public consciousness, and I’ve realized that honestly, I think conservatives are more wrong about their economic views than their social views.

6) I am with the person I want to spend every day for the rest of my life with. Okay, I kind of already knew this, and I never worried that things would change when we got to college, though I know many others thought there was at least a decent chance they would. Having made it though this year and having grown together immensely in the process, I feel better and Reed and me than I ever have, and that’s saying something. It’s just like the line from the Juno song: “I don’t see what anyone can see in anyone else but you.”

7) Williamsburg has a special place in my heart as my childhood home, and a special place in my mind as what I hope will be my future home, but it is not where I want to be right now so much. I LOVE seeing all my Williamsburg people, don’t get me wrong, but in terms of where I really feel I belong at this point in my life, it’s not there.

8) I am becoming really passionate about issues of sustainability. Sustainability is a really big thing here on campus, and recent exposure to various different speakers and sources of information has made me increasingly interested in revamping the way I live and encouraging others to do the same. For example, Reed and I have decided that this summer we’re going to do one “Vegan Day” a week on which we only eat vegan foods, in hopes to cut back our meat, dairy and eggs consumption. We hope to be up to two days a week by the start of next school year and to keep going from there.

9) I am way more of a type A personality than I ever thought. Recently my life has been all about meetings, schmoozing, applications, interviews, networking, and basically trying to cram as many opportunities and activities into my life as possible, and I’ve realized I really thrive on this. For those of you I haven’t told yet, I got the word today that I’m officially being offered my own bi-weekly column in our school newspaper next year!

10) I am extremely confused on the issue of Greek life. Catch me in a bad mood and I’ll tell you that fraternity/sorority people are the stupidest, most vapid people I’ve ever encountered… catch me in a good mood, and I’ll say that I’m honestly still considering rushing next spring. Both are true to a degree and when applied to the write fraternities/sororities. So I’m still possibly up for rush and I’m also considering joining this co-ed honors and service fraternity that I got invited to for basically having good grades. Yay! Overall, whether or not I get into Greek life, I like going to a school where it’s a big thing, because I think it makes college life more fun, like even entirely outside of the party aspect.

11) I don’t mind dorm life all that much, although I’m excited to be getting an apartment next year. Although my living situation this year was weird, I’ve really enjoyed it in the end. There are definitely downsides, but I wouldn’t go so far as to say I’m not cut out for dorm life.

12)I’m going to have an interesting relationship with Reed’s family for the rest of my life. The storm clouds gathering on the horizon at the end of last summer pretty much a poured down rain on me off and on throughout this entire school year… but I guess, at least when I’m in a good mood, I see it as an interesting challenge more than something to get all depressed about (in the moment, it can be a bit much to deal with, I’ll admit). I like them and I think I can even learn to love them in the way you love family who embarrasses, annoys, and harasses you, but they’re family all the same.

13)I definitely have a problem getting to class. That’s really about all there is to say about that…

14)I am starting (just barely) to get some ideas of what I actually want to do with my life… there’s a lot floating around right now, but I’m obviously really into politics and I really would like to make some sort of life-long contribution to the party I think has the potential to make this country a greater place. Everyone tells me that all the money is in consulting these days (not just in terms of politics but in terms of, like, everything), so I guess my dream job down the line would be some sort of political consultant or campaign advisor. I’m also very interested in learning more about doing field organizing.

15) That brings me to my final point, and it’s not really something I’ve learned, but something that’s been reinforced. All that career stuff aside, what I REALLY want to do with my life is love Reed, love my family, and love my friends, because that’s all I need. Money is something I definitely want, and it’s always been important to me, but when it comes down to it, if I have the people that I love and I feel good about myself as a person, I can do without that.